Caution: Long, whiny post ahead.

So, registering for baby stuff pretty much sucked for many reasons. First of all, you just cannot turn someone loose in a giant warehouse full of giant amounts of scary baby crap and not expect them to be totally overwhelmed. The first stop was breast pumps...wonderful! If I didn't feel like livestock before, I certainly do now! Second, both of those Wendy Bellissimo nurseries I had picked out? CRAP. Complete, utter, cheap, ugly, crap. How that woman has designed nurseries for celebrities is totally beyond me because the colors are garish in person, and the fabric looks cheap. So I had to come up with a totally different room...ended up registering for an actual girl room called "Olivia" by some random brand...the main colors are soft pink, ivory, and pale green; and the best way I can describe it is shabby chic-style. Here's a picture, but the colors look all wrong online...the photo really doesn't do it justice:



Anyhow, I'm not totally in love with it but it is pretty, and the good thing is that I can probably just keep the paint color I currently have in the room (called "crafted white," it's a buttery ivory), and maybe even use some of the sage that we used in our master bedroom to do an accent wall. I have a picture in my head, but it's kind of hard to describe. Of course, I did venture on to Pottery Barn Baby a little while ago and found a room I like even better but it has hardly any coordinating pieces and is only available online...as I found out with that other bedding, online is no indication of how something looks in person. (*By the way, I decided to go girly instead of neutral because all of the other neutral stuff looked pretty stupid.)

So, anyhow, to make an already long and tedious story somewhat shorter, about halfway through the excursion, I think I was just randomly pointing that stupid scanner at things and putting them on the registry just to get it done. Heck, I may not like half of the stuff! I pretty much figured I wouldn't register for furniture and that Craig and I would find something on our own, so when I got home I started looking up furniture. My mom sat next to me with some book that rates baby products, and of course nearly everything that we could actually afford got low quality ratings....one even got a low rating because a baby had died in the crib because of poor design and construction. WONDERFUL. I used to have all kinds of ideas about what I wanted in baby furniture, now I've narrowed it down: I want a crib that won't kill my child.

Anyways...it was good of my mom and Shayne to help me, but I think at that point there's not much that could be done to make it any easier. There were some fussy babies in the store with their parents and you know what? I DO NOT BLAME THEM. I wanted to scream and cry, too. The highlight of the trip was ooh-ing and ahh-ing over the adorable baby clothes (of course, now that I see all of the necessities we're going to have to buy for this baby; the cute clothes just aren't as appealing as they were 24 hours ago...).


Before the trip...I have no idea what I'm about to get myself into! (And is it just my hair, or is my head really big? What the heck?!)

Aside from the registry woes, I'm having a little trouble dealing with the extreme un-sexiness of this whole thing. (At this point, I should probably warn everyone, it would NOT be a good idea to get all condescending and remind me that it's all a part of having a baby, and that it's a miracle, blah blah blah...because I'd be mighty tempted to stick a fork in your eye.) Looking at those breast pumps...ugh. There is nothing attractive about milking yourself, dang it! I'm used to shopping at Victoria's secret for lacy bras, not for padded inserts so that I don't leak milk through those bras! What else, let me see....oh yes, apparently I snore like a lumberjack now. That's hot. I have hair around my belly button. And my right shoulder is breaking out, so I can't wear any of my sleeveless tops, unless I wear lots of makeup. ON MY SHOULDER. I'm sorry, I know there are plenty of people who think I'm stupid for complaining about this stuff because I should be happy I'm having a baby, but it's always been important to me to look my best and to present myself in a specific way in front of Craig...I don't go use the bathroom while he's in there shaving, for example...and it's really hitting me hard that this is all going down the drain no matter how hard I try. I'm half tempted to ban him from the delivery room, because having him witness that insanely disgusting event (yes, miracle, blah blah whatever) is like the final nail in the coffin. I feel like at the end of all of this, I'm going to have a husband who will never be attracted to me again. Maybe I'm being irrational...I mean, he *did* see me catheterized when I was in the hospital last December and that's about one of the most un-sexy things EVER, and all evidence points to him still being attracted to me after that incident...but still, it bothers me.

Ugh.